“Unoriginal.” You sighed. “Unoriginal.” You had a writer’s block. You were in your room in the bunker, on the floor. The bed was too comfortable, it was making you want to lay down and not write. But you wanted to write. So. Bad.
You had a perfect book idea in your head, but you couldn’t get the plot right. Something about a depressed artist with no motivation.
“Like yourself?” Castiel, your angel friend, was suddenly beside you, looking down at your laptop.
“Oh my gosh Castiel.” You tried to brush off how frightened you were with a laugh.
“I didn’t mean to frighten you.” He offered a smile.
“You didn’t… Never mind. What are you talking about?” You were confused as to what he meant when he came in.
“You’re writing about a ‘depressed artist’.” He was bloody quoting you.
“Yeah… But I’m not depressed.” Lies. You knew you were, everyone knew you were. It wasn’t crippling depression, you could hide it. You could laugh, smile, and talk normally. But you were still very depressed. Living a life being the boy’s (Sam and Dean’s) case finder. Kind of like a secretary? You just stayed in the bunker, bought groceries, found cases, while they went out and fought. They still did work, they weren’t lazy, and honestly they didn’t need you. But you thought they deserved you. They worked hard, protecting people. And you wanted to pay them back.
He tilted his head, as he always does when confused. “You don’t need to lie to me, (Y/N). It’s okay. I don’t feel any different to you.”
You blushed, quickly looking back to your lap. “I, what did you want?”
“You seem stressed. I want to take you on a walk.” He said.
‘How kind of him.’ You thought to yourself. ‘Why not? I’ve been working for so long.’
“You’d be surprised at the amount of inspiration you can get from walking, (Y/N).” He said as you stood up. He touched your forehead and you were both outside. It always surprised you, and made your stomach feel weird.
“We could have walked outside?” You suggested.
“Yes. But we also could have ran. Or crawled.” He said and you smiled. He was adorable.
Soon enough you had walked along a trail, and ended up at a bench. Across from the bench was a big field, full of dandelions, wild flowers, and beautiful tall grass.
“Have you found the beauty in nature?” He asked as he picked a dandelion up. It was fully matured, the seeds ready to be blown off.
“Well, I do think it is very beautiful.” You smiled. You always admired it, but you could tell he was about to make you see it in a whole new way.
“Everything has its purpose.” He examined the plant. “These, well, the leaves feed insects. Caterpillars. Then they turn into moths and butterflies, which have many purposes. To feed the birds, to pollenate, and for humans to admire them.” He blew the seeds off, then dropped the stem. He picked up another and handed it to you.
“What purposes do humans have?” You asked, suddenly feeling worried. This might make your depression worsen.
“That, I am not sure of.” He said, looking at the sky. “God never told me that. But I have a few ideas.”
“And they are?”
“To take care of the Earth.” He looked at you and smiled. “To protect animals that are near extinction. But that is not their real purpose, since many humans have caused extinctions.” He stopped to shake his head. “Poor humans. All they know is death.”
You looked at him, he seemed genuinely sad. “Castiel?” You said and he looked at you again.
“Can I kiss you?”
There was silence. You hadn’t always liked him, honestly. Yes, he was cute. And sweet and kind. But you really only had eyes for Charlie. But she didn’t come around much. Now that you had talked like this with Castiel, well, listened to him talk, you had formed a tiny crush on him. He was beautiful.
He wasn’t confused. It did take him by surprise, though. “Why?” Well, maybe he was confused.
”I want to.” You said blatantly. “You make me happy.” It was true. He made you completely happy.
Your depression wasn’t gone, but, you did feel very light, free and happy.
He smiled. “Yes, you can.” He was sweet. Even if he didn’t want to, you knew he’d say yes.
You leaned in, setting your hand on his shoulder. It was awkward at first but then you both got comfortable. He set his hand on your hip and kissed you deeper. You couldn’t help but let out a sigh. It was so beautiful. You loved it.
You both parted and you saw his ears were red. How sweet.
“You’re adorable, Castiel.” You smiled. “Thank you for taking me on this walk. I definitely have an idea for my novel now.”